2/20/20; Week 7:Culture and Psychology

Help! I'm trapped in Societal Expectations! 

It seems culture has a tendency to brand for who we want to be. According to what John J. Ivers, Professor at BYU- Idaho tells in his lecture on Culture and Psychology, there is a cultural ought-self and a real-self. Our- ought self is typically reliant upon what the society we live in tells us. The real- self is us in reality. Supposedly, the more our real-self relates to our ought-self, the higher self-esteem we'll have because we're more culturally accepted or praised.

This principle leads to self-fulfilling prophesies where people get incredibly caught up in what they're supposed to be according to society. So much so, they embed deep, at times irrational, beliefs that shape who they are. Ivers gave the example of the Salem witch trials, and how the culture at the time caused people to believe in witches cursing them, when in reality the people they went so far as to kill were innocent.

Another extreme example I thought of that I've learned about in the past was in the middle ages there was a phenomenon called lycanthropy. There was a mass panic that someone had been bitten by a werewolf, and a ton of other people would also believe they too had been bitten, and they'd act ludicrous. They'd even run around rabidly, howling and growling like a wolf would. Their culture at the time, what everyone else was doing made them think these (at least what seems to us) insane delusions.

As I contemplated whether or not I have any irrational self-esteem deficiencies due to my culture, I found it hard to think of any specific things I personally have issues with. This is most likely due in part to the positive side of the United State's culture that values uniqueness. There is a much wider scope for the ought-self, than there would be in some other countries. Of course that doesn't mean we don't have irrational thought processes due to our culture. There is plenty. One that I think effects a lot of people is how doing well in school is seen as so important, people will consider themselves dumb if they don't do well in it. But the thing with school is sometimes it doesn't matter how smart you are if you aren't very gifted with academics and the system they operate under. Some people don't have 'book smarts' as they say, but 'street smarts.' This is troublesome for those who are like this because they'll forever think they're stupid because they don't get grades like the 'smart kids.' Their real-self- their smart self, doesn't match with culture's expectations that a smart person gets good grades. 

I find myself and others of my faith to be at an abnormal advantage to the world when it comes to seeing rationally and keeping a leveled self-esteem though, because we've have had a delightful consistent reminder in our doctrine. It's plainly stated in this scripture: Doctrine and Covenants 18:10 "Remember the worth of souls is great in the sight of God." Knowing there's a potential to become more than mere mortals on earth buoys up the spirit, and rises above the cage of cultural demands. Not to mention we also know that we have our agency which helps us to know we have a choice to do what will advance the real-self, rather than just lining up to fit in with the ought-self.

What I think the biggest thing we can learn with this knowledge in our hands is that we should often take time to evaluate some of the things we do or think and see if they're making us happy. If they're not, we can say there's a possibility it's because our real-self isn't aligning with our ought-self. Then we'll be able to tell if we can change what we can so we'll be happier by not being trapped my societal expectations. 



















sources:
https://video.byui.edu/media/06+Culture+and+Psychology/0_s4h3d6bc

2/18/20; Week 7: Cross-Cultural Students in the Classroom

Labels- What's in the bottle? 

What's in the bottle above? Is it soda? It looks like maybe it could be chocolate milk, or perhaps it's just dirty water. There's only one way to find out- taste it. 

We have no idea what's in the bottle! Based on our past experiences with liquids of this color, we will judge it to be whatever we think it is, most likely before we ever chance to taste it. We'll put a label on it, whatever we think it is. It looks like dirty water to me, therefore it is dirty water. 

Do we do this with people? Someone's behaviors may paint them a certain color to us, and we label that color to fit in our minds with what we have understood it to be in the past, based on our past experiences, and our culture. Take for instance a teacher who as a student that never comments in a class, never participates, never looks the teacher in the eye. That student could be labeled by the teacher as standoffish, rude, maybe even dumb because they don't respond the way other students do. But if we taste what's inside that bottle, or get to know the student, we might find that student is merely trying to be respectful to the teacher.

As a teacher in the diverse TESOL classroom, we will be dealing with students that have certain behaviors that we may not be used to. It might take us a while to get used to them, but we shouldn't judge them immediately as negative behaviors, when we don't know the behavior's purpose. John J. Ivers, professor at BYU-Idaho in his lecture on cross-cultural students in the classroom tells us,"Whenever a student is from a different place or ethnic group or something does anything weird, you have to give them the benefit of the doubt. Even though you may be interpreting it negatively, it may not be meant negatively." As teachers one of the best things we can do is to hold off on our assumptions about a student. Because whether we realize it or not, it could change the way we treat them, even with little things. The little things add up, and may jeopardize the student's entire learning experience. 


It seems to me the biggest culprit to misunderstandings among diverse groups of people is the labels, or impressions we place on others.Just one simple gesture from another person, can paint them an entirely different color, even if their intentions are pure. The bottle of soda could turn into dirty water with a blink of an eye if we don't take the time to open up the bottle and taste it. (Don't literally taste your student, you could get arrested.) Metaphorically speaking, I think it's critical we make a genuine effort to understand our students, as well as anyone else we know, before we wrongly label them in our minds. It would be a sad thing to miss out on a wonderful relationship with someone because of a simple misjudgment.   

Have any of you been in a situation where you had to reevaluate your presumption of someone? Did you end up learning something interesting about them?





Sources:
https://video.byui.edu/media/06+Cross-Cultural+Students+in+the+Classroom/0_r2lcaswt

2/18/20; Week 7:Differences in Manners

Be Careful with your Food, you Could Cause a War. 

At a round table in the middle of Lebanon, my sister sits with her boyfriend and his family for a meal in a nice restaurant. They laugh and talk, using chopsticks to dip their food into the bowl of sauce they each have. My sister dips her pastry into the sauce, but loses her grip and the pastry plops into the sauce. She tries to go back in to rescue it, but her boyfriend discreetly squeezes her arm and shakes his head firmly with wide eyes. Under his breath, so no one can hear he says "don't reach back in for it." She was to pretend she'd never dropped it. 

In Lebanese culture, they have some strict table manners. My sister nearly broke one of them. It's very rude to dig around in the sauce with your own chopsticks even if you did drop your food in there. He later explained this to her, that his family would have been pretty shocked if she'd done what she was about to. 

Now imagine my sister was a diplomat having an important dinner with an international ally, and no one had been there to stop her from committing such a sin. It could have had disastrous implications. They would have been insulted, or thought she was a slob, which might have caused them to consider her whole country as offenders. A diplomat being rude to another country can cause horrible things- even wars or betrayal. This goes to show how important it is to know about another country's difference in manners. 

Even on a smaller scale, such as the TESOL classroom, a difference in manners and interpretations of those manners can end very badly. Say I'm teaching a class of students in Thailand, and to congratulate them on doing something right, I pat them on the head- a part of the body they considered very sacred. Touching it is incredibly disrespectful. Without knowing I just made that student feel horrible, and probably ruined his experience in class. This can disrupt learning and possibly even self-esteem issues. That's a big deal! 

To think that a difference in a simple mannerism such as touching someone on the head, or doing something to your food that seems normal to you- can cause such a negative reactions in others! It's crucial we be careful of our mannerisms around other cultures- especially our impressionable young students. 











Sources: 

https://video.byui.edu/media/06+Difference+in+Manners/0_xc0a34gb

https://people.howstuffworks.com/13-examples-of-good-and-bad-manners-around-the-world3.htm

2/16/20; Week 6: Personal Space Differences

Get out of my BUBBLE 

If you watch even just the first minute of this video, you'll see how uncomfortable the girl is. It's not just because of his bulging eyes or what he's saying, it's his loudness, and his proximity. All of which are invading her personal space. 

Everyone has a limit to their 'personal space,' and those who come from a culture that like a lot of distance, or quiet can easily clash with those from those who are used to being close. 

I had a bit of an strange experience that I thought of as I pondered times I had invaded or been invaded by someone's proximity. One of my old roommates was from Scotland, and she had this British friend who came over who I never really talked to. But she told me one day that he didn't like me. And I was like- "what? I've never even talk to him! How could he 'not like' me?" And she told me how it was because one time he'd come over with some friends and I had just woken up from a nap when I went into the lounge where they all were. I was heavily disoriented, it was a deep nap, and seeing all the unfamiliar faces right off the bat confused me. So I imagine I might have looked a bit like a troll coming out of my room the way I did as I kept asking them "who are you? Who are you?" I wasn't harassing them or anything, I was just dazed, I wasn't being rude in any way- I always love company! But her British friend thought that I was rude with how 'loud' I was. (I am telling you I really wasn't loud! I was quite calm actually- picture sleepy off of Snow White- I was in the kind of state). Yet I suppose the mannerisms I'd displayed in that moment that all of my American roommates didn't have a problem with, seemed off-putting and abrupt to him who likes a lot of quiet and personal space. 

This goes to show how good it is to know a little bit about where someones bubble lies and what will penetrate it. In my case, asking forward questions in a not very hushed tone was 'rude.' What a blessing this knowledge will be in the classroom! I'll know to tread lightly with new students, and test them gradually to figure them out, so I don't scare them off like I did that British guy.

What's funny is I'm an American, and I frightened a person from Britain with my idea of personal space, yet I've had friends from Brazil tell me they think most Americans are quite 'cold.' I've also heard that even across the United States there is a variation between how close people talk. 

Knowing about personal buffers and boundaries in others can help us realize when we are judging someone. Those who come from a different culture might be seen as weird when they don't associate with others the same way. This can be vital information both in the TESOL classroom, and life when we observe others and try to understand how to approach them. 




Sources:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r8FQsg12hoY (You should really watch this, it made me laugh- It's got people being crammed into a subway) 

https://westsidetoastmasters.com/resources/book_of_body_language/chap9.html

https://video.byui.edu/media/05+Personal+Space+Differences/0_yz4lk5f0

2/16/20; Week 6: Attributional Tendencies

What's your cause? 

So it's your fault!
But
See, it's her fault!
But
And it isn't mine at all!
But what?
Well, if you hadn't gone
Back up again
We were needy
You were greedy!
Did you need that hen?
But I got it for my mother!
So it's her fault then! 

This is just a short snippet of the lyrics from the song "it's your fault" from the musical "Into the Woods." The characters are all in a circle pointing fingers at each other, trying to place blame for the sticky situation they got caught in. If you can- you should check it out, it's catchy, and teaches a good message. It correctly conveys how the circle of blame tends to go in circles.

 What or who do you blame when something bad happens? We blame because it gives cause to our effect. It's a natural human tendency. However, where we tend to attribute the cause to can be a result of our culture, or sometimes even our personality. The judgements we make from the events in our lives or the things we do, are our attributional tendencies. There's internal attribution where you place the cause of an event due to your own actions, and there's external attribution where you place the cause of an event on outside people or forces. These can be positive or negative.  

To be honest I'd never really thought about attributional tendencies being a cultural thing until viewing John J. Iver's lecture on attributional tendencies. It makes me wonder what it is in a culture that makes us lean towards internal versus external attributions. Personally, I think it's very circumstantial for me, though I could be biased in certain situations where I might not know the full story. I think what I can learn from knowing how it can be cultural though, is that it will make me more aware of what I'm attributing my problems or successes to.  I know I, a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints believe that I have agency to choose my own behavior, and therefore technically that decides the consequences. However I have been a culprit in the past of external attributions, thinking that God was 'punishing' me. I don't really believe this is true, but truly we humans can get caught up in our ideas and focus so much on the negative things that we become illogical.  

Knowing about the differences people have in their attrubutional tendencies, I'll be better prepared when certain situations arise in the classroom, like when a student finds themselves guilty over having spilt the milk,when really someone pushed them into it. I won't be able to simply tell them that it's not their fault, because cultural paradigms are too deeply ingrained into us for it to be that simple. But rather, I know now that I can come from their point of view, understanding how they view the situation, and I can guide them through to a more rational conclusion. 

Overall, attributional tendencies are something we deal with everyday, and it's our choice where we attribute the cause to, if only we are aware of the cultural biases we might have. It also helps us as TESOL teachers who deal with students from all over who might have various attributional tendencies we will need to learn about. 

What sort of tendencies do you guys have in your cultures? Do you think your personality has anything to do with it? 

Sources to check out: 

"Your fault." 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o1dnTvbdtyo

https://wattersattribution.wordpress.com/bias-in-attribution/

https://www.sparknotes.com/psychology/psych101/socialpsychology/section3/

https://video.byui.edu/media/05+Attributional+Tendencies+in+Cultures/0_u45682wd

2/13/20; Week 6: Individualism Vs. Collectivism

Individualism Vs. Collectivism 


See if you can notice the difference between this set of quotes- 

“It's weird not to be weird.” - John Lennon 

"It's my right!" - Every American ever. 

“I hold it to be the inalienable right of anybody to go to hell in his own way.”― Robert Frost




And this set of quotes- 

"It's better that one man should Perish than that a nation should dwindle and perish in unbelief." -  1 Nephi 4:13


Collectivism requires self-sacrifice, the subordination of one's interests to those of others - Ayn Rand


One set of quotes places importance on the individual and doing what they want to do. The second set seems to emphasize an individuals need to do what is best for the society, or becoming one with others.  

Did you choose what university you wanted to go to based on what or how you wanted to study, or where your family needed to be? What about what you chose to wear this morning? Was it based on what color would make you pop, or what might help you blend in more? These decisions are based on whether or not we live our lives individualistically or collectively. On one hand in individualism, sticking out and being unique is praised and will get you higher places in society. In collectivism it's all about the unit, how it grows as one. Depending on where your from, you probably lean one way or the other in your daily decisions. 

When it comes to assessing the behavior and needs of my future students that will come from all over the world, there's a lot to learn. John J. Ivers, professor at BYU- Idaho gave a lecture on Individualism vs. Collectivism and he talked about how there was a Japanese baseball team that went drinking. When they got in trouble for drinking and driving, not just the driver got his license taken away, but everyone on the team did. This story made me think about how some students in the future might expect me to treat them differently. I haven't thought about that much in the past- how much a student would expect of me as a teacher. They might end up thinking I'm being unfair if their expectations don't match with my behavior. 

There are many potential misunderstandings that could surface from those that lean towards an individual culture versus a group culture. For one, those in an individualistic culture might try to stand out in the classroom, and be overly communicative. Where as those from a collective culture might not stand out on purpose, and as someone from an individualistic culture, we might take that the wrong way. To better be prepared for these issues I'll have to understand why my students do certain things that they do. I'll need to learn as much as I can about their home life and how it will influence their needs in the classroom. 

Something I wonder about the clashing of these two cultures that I'd like to ask you guys to answer in the comments is: what benefits or drawbacks you see that come from living in either of these two cultures? 

P.S. fun fact- it took me forever to find any positive quotes on collectivism when I looked on the internet! Which I thought was very interesting, a lot of them were quite negative about it! Google takes into consideration where you live- maybe if I lived in Japan or some other place that is very group orientated I would have been given different search results! 














Sources to check out-
John J. Ivers's lecture on Individualism vs. Collectivism


https://video.byui.edu/media/05+Individualism+vs+Collectivism/0_ojon0rjc

2/11/20; Week 6: Differences in Emotional Expressivity

Differences in Emotional Expressivity 

This week I had the opportunity to listen to a lecture from John J. Ivers, a professor at BYU-Idaho about differences in emotional expressivity. He talked about how low-expressivity would be akin to someone being more stoic in public than in private, and those with higher expressivity, very vocal and expressive with their emotions. 

I remember a time where I, a girl from a culture of moderate expressivity, was very intimidated by high emotional expressivity. When I was about ten I went with my step mom to visit her friend from Greece because she wanted to be to be friends with her son, Nico. Greeks have very high expressivity, and when she would ask me questions it would sometimes startle me and I wasn't sure what to say. 

She'd say abruptly, "Well- when do you want to come over and play with Nico?" Which is a simple question, but in my mind, I didn't want to seem demanding or obtrusive, so I just shrugged, smiling. "Whenever is fine." 

And she'd say "Speak up and make up your mind, girl. Just tell me what you want. Don't be shy- I don't like when people are shy!" 

I remember feeling my face going hot, even as I kept a plastered smile on and tried to be polite. I wasn't sure how to react to someone being so direct. 

It's funny because in my perspective, she was all up in my grill, and I was a tad terrified. But to her, I was being difficult by not being forward with my thoughts and speaking up. What's even funnier is how I have been in the reverse situation where I intimidated a boy in one of my classes who was from China, who was quite introverted. When I spoke to him, I was animated and asked him a lot of questions that at times would cause him to stare at me, stiff, his pupils small. I hadn't realized I'd 'come on a little too strong,' until later, which I think is how those from low-expressive countries would few those with higher expressivity. Have you guys even been made uncomfortable in situations like that?  

My experiences being in both situations help me to be conscientious of how it would play into my role as a teacher. I don't want to frighten my students how I was, or how I did to that poor quiet Chinese boy. This got me thinking how it would be entertaining for TESOL students to do activities aimed to help them practice awareness of others expressive levels and their own. So I started to research some ideas for games to help exercise their awareness. I found an article with a list of good ideas that immerse students in one another's cultures which I listed down below. One of my favorites in that list which I plan to use in class someday was "Saying Hello" where you have the students explain to each other what they do in their own cultures to greet, not just in their language, but also their body language. I liked this one the most because body language is the number one way people show their emotions, so what better way to get them used to understanding each other?   

Do you guys think that you could benefit from activities like that with your future or maybe current students? Let me know what level of expressivity you think you (as an individual) might have! 

Sources to check out- 

John J. Iver's lecture on Differences in Emotional Expressivity 

https://video.byui.edu/media/05+Differences+in+Emotional+Expressivity/0_753le546

Cultural Shock Activities 

https://www.fluentu.com/blog/educator-english/esl-culture-shock-activities/